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Huzzah! Canon Blows Away Competition with T5!


By any measure, it’s been a wild winter camera season, with major releases from just about every manufacturer. You want full-frame? They’ve got new full frame (Nikon Df, Sony A7/A7r)! You want retro? They’ve got retro (Olympus OM-anything, Fuji X-T1). You want medium format? They’ve got medium format (Phase 1, Hasselblad, Pentax). You want 4K video? They’ve got 4k video (Panasonic GH4). You want alien technology? They’ve got alien technology (Sigma DP, Hasselblad HV).

Not to be outdone in the new camera frenzy, Canon has saved the best for last, vanquishing all other camera announcements to also-rans and sending competing engineers back to their drawing tables…Introducing the T5! The new camera is leaps and bounds ahead of its predecessor in so many areas that if you don’t get up and order the T5 right this very moment then you are just a stupid worthless nothing!

Don’t let the evolutionary name fool you–the T5 is a digital imaging revolution…nothing less than the re-invention of the camera itself! Here are just some of the features that make the T5 (aka 1200D on other planets) the must-have camera of the season:



Do you remember HAL from 2001: A Space Odyssey? HAL was made of plastic…and so is the T5! This space-age material is used extensively throughout the T5!



Canon takes sand, exposes it to high temperatures, and makes glass!  That’s how important the T5 is to their strategy!



Deep within the sleek, futuristic body of the T5 beats a heart of silicon, ones, and zeros! That’s right, much like your Casio Calculator Watch, the T5 contains a real, actual computer. No more dealing with bulky mainframes and punchcards!



The T5 has 18 Megapickles, each carefully fermented in vinegar, yet still crunchy and full of ISO goodness!



The T5 doesn’t just greedily capture photons, it also makes its own, with the included Rebel Photon Maker!



But wait…there’s more! Each T5 comes in its own box and includes a strap that says Canon on it. Hang the the T5 around you neck for the absolutely latest in high tech fashion!

After the release of the T5, we wouldn’t be surprised if all other camera makers just gave up. It’s that revolutionary. Game. Set. Match. Canon T5!

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  1. And it’s made by human hands that are NOT OILY! I would shake hands with these guys after a day at work.

  2. Wait a minute here. Are you saying that I can make photons AND capture them with the same camera?

    I am dumping Nikon

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