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New Outbreak of Full Frame Fever Spotted

2091

The Center for Sensor Control (CSC) is reporting that they’ve detected a fresh new outbreak of Full Frame Fever (FFF) in Fujifilm communities, precipitated by rumors of a full frame Fujifilm mirrorless camera. Fujifilm fans have been spotted using Ouija boards and divining rods to try to conjure this new camera into existence from the ether.

Full Frame Fever is often misdiagnosed as Decline in Image Quality Syndrome (DIIQS) due to very similar symptoms—loud sighing when taking photos, sad sighing when chimping photos, resigned sighing when viewing on computer, and self-deprecating statements when posting said photos online (i.e., “These photos are from an older crappy camera but I thought that I’d post anyway because I’m lonely.”).

But FFF and DIIQS differ in a number of key areas. While FFF is limited to photographers using APS-C and smaller sensors, DIIQS can strike photographers of all sizes, from 1/zillion” smartphone users to large format, big box on a wooden tripod masochists. And while DIIQS may be treated with any number of cameras, FFF can only be treated with a limited number of digital cameras offered by Nikon, Canon, Sony, and Leica along with any number of older film cameras.

CSC officials are deploying FFF-trained care workers to the affected Fujifilmians, offering soothing words, copies of positive reviews of their current gear, and lens roadmaps filled with fast primes.

The longest continuous outbreak of Full Frame Fever can be found in Pentax communities, who have a large percentage of owners presenting the classic FFF symptoms, making many of them particularly sad and irritable.

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