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Sony Discovers Mysterious Artifacts of Unknown Purpose

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At CP+ in Japan, Sony announced that they have found metal, plastic, and glass cylinders in a far corner of a warehouse and are trying to determine if the objects are talismans or religious objects from the lost tribe of Konica Minolta. Sony engineers and archaeologists are studying the found artifacts carefully, hoping to better understand their function and use in the Konica Minolta tribal rituals. Sony said, “We have never seen anything like these objects before and have no idea what they are for but are determined to find out because a better understanding of our distant past gives us insight into our present situation and hopefully points us towards a brighter future. At this point in time, our best guess is that these metal, plastic, and glass cylinders were part of the Konica Minolta ‘film’ rituals, but how exactly they were used during the ritual and what type of virgins they sacrificed are beyond our understanding at the moment.” Sony is consulting with the British Museum in London and the American Museum of Natural History on carbon dating the artifacts and looking for matching imprints in peat bogs and sedimentary stone in and around Southern California. Additionally, Sony is crowdsourcing their search and is at CP+ showing these artifacts to passers-by and asking them, “Do you have any clue what these things are and what to do with them?”

In other news, Sony is planning to announce over 50 new cameras in full-frame and APS-C formats with variable aperture kit zoom lenses.

 

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